KIM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!!! (10)

The last and greatest cause of this malady is our own conscience, sense of our sins, and God's anger justly deserved, a guilty conscience for some foul offence formerly committed. "A good conscience is a continual feast," but a galled conscience is as great a torment as can possibly happen, a still-baking oven, another hell. Our conscience, which is a great ledger-book, wherein are written all our offences, a register to lay them up (which those Egyptians in their hieroglyphics expressed by a mill, as well as for the continuance as for the torture of it), grinds out souls with the remembrance of some precedent sins, makes us reflect upon, accuse and condemn our own selves...I know there be many other causes assigned by Zanchius, Musculus, and the rest; as incredulity, infidelity, presumption, ignorance, blindness, ingratitude, discontent, those five grand miseries in Aristotle, ignominy, need, sickness, enmity, death, etc.; but this of conscience is the greatest, torturing the body like an ulcer ...

Robert  Burton,  The Anatomy of Melancholy

KIM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!!! (9)

...our eyes and other senses will commonly deceive us; it may be, to thee thyself upon a more serious examination, or after a little absence, she is not so fair as she seems...It may not be that she is so fair, but her coats, or put another in her clothes, and she will seem all out as fair; as the poet then prescribes, separate her from her clothes: suppose thou saw her in a base beggar's weed, or else dressed in some hirsute attires out of fashion, foul linen, coarse raiments, besmeared with soot, colly, perfumed with opoponax, sagapenum, asafoetida, or some such filthy gums, dirty, or about some undecent action or other...Suppose thou beheld her in a frosty morning, in cold weather, in some passion or perturbation of mind, weeping, chafing, etc., rivelled and ill-favored to behold. She many times that in a composed look seems so amiable and delicious, of so elegant an appearance, if she do but laugh or smiles, makes an ugly sparrow-mouthed face, and shows a pair of uneven, loathsome, rotten. foul teeth; she hath a black skin, gouty legs, a deformed crooked carcass under a fine coat. It may be for all her costly tires she is bald, and though she seem so fair by dark, by candle-light, or afar off, as Callicratides observed in Lucian, "if though should see her near or in the morning, she would appear more ugly than a beast."...if you reflect on what issues from her mouth and nostrils and other orifices of her body you will say that you have never seen such filth. Follow my counsel, see her undressed, if it be possible, out of her attires, stripped of her stolen colours, it may be that she...will be loathsome and ridiculous, thou wilt not endure her sight; or suppose thou saw'st her sick, pale, in a consumption, on her death-bed, skin and bones or now dead, she whose embrace was  so agreeable, her aspect will be horrible. As a posy she smells sweet, is most fresh and fair one day, but dried up, withered, and stinks another...thy lovely mistress who erst was dearer to thee than thy eyes, once sick or departed, is worse than any dirt or dunghill. Her embraces are not so acceptable now as her looks are terrible; thou hadst better observe a Gorgon's head than Helena's carcass.

Robert Burton, The Anatomy of Melancholy

KiM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!!! (8)

... [T]he greatest provocations for lust are from our apparel; God makes, they say, man shapes, and there is no motive like unto it ... A filthy knave, a deformed quean, a crooked carcass, a maukin, a witch, a rotten post, an hedge-stake may be set out and tricked up that is shall make as fair a show, as much enamour, as the rest; many a silly fellow is so taken...Not that comeliness of clothes is therefore to be condemned, and those usual ornaments: there is a decency and decorum in this as there are in other things...Why do they crown themselves with gold and silver, use coronets and tires of several fashions, deck themselves with pendants, bracelets, earrings, chains, girdles, rings, pins, spangles, embroideries, shadows, rabatoes, versicolour ribands? Why do they make such glorious shows with their scarves, feathers, fans, masks, furs, laces, tiffanies, ruffs, falls, cauls, cuffs, damasks, velvets, tinsels, cloths of gold, silver, tissue? stones, odours, flowers, birds, beasts, fishes, and whatsoever Africa, Asia, America, sea, land, art and industry of man can afford" Why do they use and covet such novelties of invention, such new-fangled tires, and spend such inestimable sums on them?...Why are they like so many Sybarites, or Nero's Poppea, Ahasuerus' concubines, so costly, so long a-dressing as Caesar was marshaling his army, or a hawk in pruning...they had more need some of them to be tied in Bedlam with iron chains, have a whip for a fan, and hair-cloths next to their skins, and instead of wrought smocks, have their cheeks stigmatized with a hot iron, I say, some of our Jezebels, instead of painting if they were well served. But why all this labour, all this cost, preparation, riding, running, far-fetched and dear-bought stuff? "Because, forsooth, they would be fair and fine, and where nature is defective, supply it by art."

Robert  Burton , The Anatomy of Melancholy

KIM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!!! (7)

(In a craven effort to move up on Google searches for Kim Kardashian, I have abandoned The Kim Kardashian Reading Series for this slightly more lurid title. I considered KIM KARDASHIAN EXPOSED !!!, but that seemed a bit much, and also mean-spirited in a way to don't intend. Of course if numbers don't go up, I may be reduced to even more lascivious headings. Meanwhile, Kim continues to share her readings with followers of Potato Weather.)

Idleness overthrows all, love tyrannizeth in an idle person. If thou hast nothing to do, thou shalt be haled in pieces with envy, lust, some passion or another. Through doing nothing men learn to do ill. 'Tis Aristotle's simile, "As match or touchwood takes fire, so does an idle person love." ...Love, as Theophrastus defines it, is an affection of the idle mind, or as Seneca describes it, "youth begets it, riot maintains it, idleness nourisheth it, etc."

Robert  Burton, The Anatomy of Melancholy

KIM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!! (6)

Though they flourish many times, such temporizing foxes, and blear the world's eyes by flattery, bribery, dissembling their natures and other men's weakness, that cannot so apprehend their tricks, yet in the end they will be discerned, and precipitated in a moment: "Surely," David says, "thou has set them in slippery places." (Ps. lxxxiii, 18.) ...Or put case they escape, and rest unmasked to their life's end, yet after their death their memory stinks as a snuff of a candle put out, and those that durst not mutter against them in their lives, will prosecute their names with satires, libels, and bitter imprecations, they shall be in ill repute in all succeeding ages, and be odious to the world's end.

Robert Burton,   The  Anatomy of Melancholy

KIM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!! (5)

But no man hears us, we are most miserably dejected. Our bodies have scarce room for a new stripe. We can get no relief, no comfort, no succor. We have tried all means, yet find no remedy; no man living can express the anguish and bitterness of our souls, but we that endure it. We are, forsaken, in torture of body and mind, in another hell: what shall we do?...our estate is far more miserable, much more to be deplored, and far greater cause have we to lament; the devil and the world persecute us, all good fortune has forsaken us, we are left to the rage of beggary, cold, hunger, thirst, nastiness, sickness, irksomeness, to continual torment, labor and pain, to derision and contempt, bitter enemies all, and far worse than any death; death alone we desire, death we seek, yet cannot have it, and what shall we do?...comfort thyself with this yet, thou art at the worst, and before long it will either overcome thee or thou it...misery is virtue's whetstone.

Robert Burton,   The Anatomy of Melancholy

KIM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!!( 4)

There is nothing so beautiful and legitimate as to play the man well and properly, no knowledge so hard to acquire as the knowledge of how to live this life well and naturally; and the most barbarous of our maladies is to despise our own being.

Michel de Montaigne

KIM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!! (3)

Now go and brag of thy present happiness, whosoever thou art, brag of thy temperature, of thy good parts, insult, triumph, and boast: thou seest in what a brittle state thy art, how soon thou mayest be dejected, how many several ways, by bad diet, by bad air, a small loss or a little sorrow, or discontent, an ague, etc., how many sudden accidents may procure thy ruin; what a small tenure of happiness thou hast in this life, how weak and silly a creature thou art...Thou dost not flourish and have goods of body, mind, and fortune, thou knowest not what storms and tempests the late evening may bring with it. Be not secure then, "be sober and watch," be not puffed up by thy good fortune, if fortunate and rich; if sick and poor, moderate thyself. I have spoken.

Robert  Burton, The Anatomy of Melancholy (New York Review Books Classics)

KIM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!! (2)

...they have their best education, good institution, sole qualification from us, and when they have done well their honor and immortality from us; we are the living tombs, registers, and as so many trumpets of their fame: What was Achilles without Homer?Alexander without Arian and Curtius. Who had known the Caesars but for Suetonius and Dion?

Robert Burton, The Anatomy of Melancholy (New York Review Books Classics)

KIM KARDASHIAN REVEALED !!! (1)

A myriad of men are born; they labor and sweat and struggle for bread; they squabble and scold and fight; they scramble for little mean advantages over each other; age creeps up on them; infirmities follow; shames and humiliations bring down their prides and vanities; those they love are taken from them and the joy of life is turned to aching grief. The burden of pain, care, misery grows heavier year by year; at length ambition is dead; vanity is dead; longing for release is in their place. It comes at last -- the only unpoisoned gift earth ever had for them -- and they vanish from a world where they were of no consequence...Then another myriad takes their place.

Mark Twain,  The Autobiography of Mark Twain